sweet solace
by czqy
Summary: In which Todoroki isn't feeling okay, but Midoriya is there for him.


Within moments of making it inside his dorm room, there's a knock at Midoriya's door. He's surprised (he hasn't even had the chance to take off his blazer yet), because everyone usually rushes back to get changed before doing anything else, whether it be going about with their own business or hanging out with others. Nevertheless, he unlocks his door to let whoever it is outside in, and when he sees that it's just Todoroki, he smiles.

"Hello there mister," he starts in a teasing tone, walking back into his room, "eager to see me already? We just finished class, Todoroki-kun." It's not uncommon for Todoroki to show up at his room (or for him to go knocking at Todoroki's door)—they're boyfriends, after all—but it is a bit odd that Todoroki came straight over, with his bag and everything.

"Izuku," Todoroki starts, and Midoriya snaps his head around immediately. They aren't on a first name basis yet, at least not fully, but they've used it often enough for Midoriya to understand the situation right away. Something is wrong. "I…" Todoroki trails off, and he shakes his head a little bit, and this is when Midoriya realises he's had his head down the whole time.

Slowly, and carefully, Midoriya takes a few steps towards his boyfriend. When he's close enough to touch, he reaches out and takes Todoroki's hands. This makes him glance upwards, but strands of hair obscure his eyes, so Midoriya brushes them aside, letting his hand linger on his cheek.

"Hey," he says softly, looking intently into turquoise-grey eyes, "I'm here." And Todoroki nods, just slightly, and he lets Midoriya lead him into the room, and they sit on his bed.

Midoriya lets go of Todoroki momentarily so they can both take their blazers off, and so he can put Todoroki's bag down next to his, but as soon as he comes back he initiates contact again. He hugs Todoroki this time, holds him close to his chest, one arm cradling his head, the other resting on his shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Midoriya feels the shake of Todoroki's head more than he sees it. "Okay. Want me to talk then?" There's a nod.

Midoriya, of course, is worried about Todoroki. He doesn't know if something happened, or if it's just one of those days, but he does know he wants Todoroki to be okay. He has a habit of keeping things to himself, bottling up emotions until they threaten to burst, but it's something they've been working on since getting together.

They fought a lot about it at first ('The line of work we do is _dangerous_ , I need to know if something's up!'; 'Don't you _trust_ me?'; 'You need to stop _risking_ yourself like this!'), but now they more or less have some kind of a system. Midoriya will give Todoroki a heads up, when possible, if he's about to do something crazy, and Todoroki will share when he's ready. Midoriya gets that it takes time though, so for now he's content with doing whatever is needed to soothe Todoroki's emotions.

"Well," Midoriya draws the word out, thinking of what he should say, "I made a joke to my mum the other day about getting more piercings, and she _freaked_. She said something along the lines of, 'Are you becoming a rock star or a pro hero?'. And then I had to tell her that just because I got a haircut and pierced _one_ part of my ear, albeit a few times, it doesn't mean I'm 'straying from the path'." Todoroki chuckles softly, and Midoriya grins. "I couldn't add this part, but I was tempted to say that it's also a great hit with the guys and gals."

"Hey…" Todoroki looks up at Midoriya and pouts in protest.

"Fine," Midoriya rolls his eyes, "it's a great hit with _one_ guy." He winks at his boyfriend after, and is delighted to see him blush. _Even after all this time, huh?_

"How is she?"

"Who— My mum? Oh, she's good. Now that we're second years, and have settled into all this more, she worries a lot less. Although I'm not sure if it is much different, because like, her worry for me has halved, but now she worries about you too, you know? I don't know, I try to tell her not to stress out, that we've got everything covered, but obviously it isn't that easy. It doesn't help when I come home with a new scar either."

Midoriya has gotten a lot better at controlling his quirk, but sometimes he slips up, and other times he needs to push himself beyond his limits for certain reasons. He's never really had a distaste for his scars though—they represent how far he's come, and also, Todoroki likes to kiss them, so he's got no complaints.

"She's great; and smart. Maybe you should listen to her more. Stop hurting yourself."

"Oi, look who's talking now! I'm not the one who nearly burned down the training area the other day and collapsed a structure on top of myself."

"Okay, fair, but I know you liked what I was doing before that happened. You think the blue flames are _hot_."

Midoriya _bursts_ into laughter. It's not even funny, but the way Todoroki delivers it has him shaking. Todoroki smiles to himself, seems to remember something, and then the lightness is suddenly gone. The sun hides behind clouds, and Midoriya holds Todoroki closer. He starts to run his fingers through the red-white hair, but doesn't say anything; they're content in the silence, they find comfort in it. Todoroki has his eyes closed for a while, and when he opens them, he starts fiddling with the tip of Midoriya's tie.

"Oh, isn't this actually the exact same colour as Kirishima-kun's hair?"

"Hm?"

"The tie. I don't know why I've never noticed before. Anyways, his new hairstyle is pretty cool."

"Yeah, it is."

"God, Kacchan wouldn't shut up about it. 'Did you see his hair?'; 'Look at his hair'; and then he actually came up to me with Kirishima-kun once to make sure I saw. And I wanted to be like 'Yes, I see it, we're in the same class, I sit a row behind him, and it would've been hard not to notice since it, like, lowered his height'. But obviously I couldn't, because he probably would've gotten angry, and because, well, I'm happy for them, you know? They're great together."

"Mmh. They've come far."

"I mean, I think Kacchan has always made an exception for him though. Even if he didn't know it. Boy, was he oblivious."

"Sounds like someone else I know."

"Oh, who? Does someone have a crush? That's exciting."

Todoroki simply sighs and rolls his eyes. Midoriya looks at him with a curious expression, and Todoroki stares back, until it clicks.

"Oh my god. You mean me. Okay, yeah, that's clearly still relevant. But you can't blame me! I mean, who would've ever thought that the most popular—"

"I'm not."

"—most _handsome_ —"

"I'm not!"

"—guy in our class would fall for measly old me?"

Todoroki pinches the inside of Midoriya's arm in response, and he squirms before managing to catch Todoroki's hand. Then, he interlocks their fingers.

"Alright, alright, I get it. No self-deprecation."

"You're not measly." Todoroki says it like a declaration.

"I know."

"You saved me," Todoroki looks down at their hands together, and brings them close to his chest, holding them above his heart.

"I know," Midoriya speaks softly this time, like a whisper. "You've saved me too."

Countless times, in fact. But the most significant will always be the first, when Todoroki showed up in the alley after receiving nothing more than a text with a location. It was the first time Midoriya got a taste of what actual hero work is like, and it was there that he understood what real teamwork was, and that was what motivated him to work even harder towards his goal.

"I really care about you, you know that right?" Midoriya tries to show this through his actions as often as he can, but it doesn't hurt to also let Todoroki know in words every now and then. And in moments like these, he wants to remind Todoroki of the fact—that he's not going anywhere.

"Yeah… yeah." Todoroki shifts so he's more or less face-to-face with Midoriya. He has this open expression, and there is so much emotion behind it, and he looks so delicate, and then he cracks. He scrunches his eyes closed, tears well up before they start dropping, and he hangs his head again.

It _hurts_ Midoriya to see Todoroki like this. He wishes he could do something, anything, to help, to take away his pain. Unfortunately, he doesn't possess a quirk like that, but sometimes he honestly thinks he would trade One For All for one, if it meant Todoroki wouldn't have to suffer any longer. Instead, his heart aches for his boyfriend, and he places a hand behind his head, bringing it forward to rest against his shoulder.

"I just— I don't know if I can do this anymore. How can they expect me to— He's my _brother_." Todoroki's voice cracks on the last word, and he presses closer into Midoriya, clutching the fabric at his chest. Midoriya lets him cry for a while, he presses a kiss against the top of his head at some point, and then gently pulls back to cup Todoroki's face between his hands.

"Hey, hey. You don't owe them _anything_. It's not fair for them to expect something like this from you, it just isn't." Midoriya has his own opinions about the operation against Dabi—who was revealed to actually be Todoroki Touya—but he keeps them to himself; it isn't his place. He will, however, support whatever decisions Todoroki wants to make with regards to it. If he wants out, he will help him.

"I just miss him. I've missed him ever since he disappeared, and the fact that I know he's out there, and that he's a villain, makes it even worse. I just want my eldest brother back." The sun shines through the window, lighting the left side of Todoroki's face. He looks so much younger, like an innocent child, but his eyes tell otherwise. He's tired, and he's been broken, and he doesn't deserve this at sixteen years old.

"I'm sorry," and Midoriya hates that there's nothing he can do but offer his condolences. Because he and Todoroki both know there's no getting Touya back. He's chosen his path, and even if he isn't a bad person deep down, his actions imply otherwise. There's no way the authorities would let someone like him go.

"No, I'm sorry." Midoriya gives Todoroki a questioning look. "I don't mean to dump this all on you. Sometimes—"

"Don't you dare apologise for that. That's what I'm here for. No matter what you have to say, good or bad, I will listen. You're not a burden, Shouto."

"Okay," Todoroki nods and wipes away the last of his tears, "thank you." He brings up Midoriya's hand and places a kiss against his knuckles. "I really care about you too, by the way."

"I know," Midoriya grins.

The boys now sit cross-legged, facing each other, and Todoroki starts playing with Midoriya's fingers.

"Do you remember your whole 'hand crusher' thing?" Midoriya is reminded of it suddenly, and asks mostly to tease his boyfriend.

"Of course I do," Todoroki doesn't rise to the bait. "I really meant it, too. I freaked out about it."

"And it was hilarious! God, you sounded so serious and all, I thought you were going to confess something big."

"It was big! What if I was the first person in the world to be born with two quirks or something?!"

Midoriya giggles. "You're silly," and then he jabs Todoroki's side. "Although, I suppose that is a fair point. Hey, you sort of have two quirks already! Then that'd make you the first person in the world born with _three_ quirks."

"That's taking it a bit far." Todoroki shakes his head.

"Nah, nah, listen! I may have made a scientific breakthrough here. If we just— Oof!" Midoriya's words are cut short by Todoroki tackling him down onto the bed. He lies against his pillow, and looks up at Todoroki hovering above him. His eyes soften, and he gives a relaxed smile. Todoroki blinks at him a few times, then leans down to place a kiss against his lips. He leans into it, tilts his head up for more, but Todoroki pulls away.

" _You're_ the silly one." Todoroki kisses his cheek this time.

Midoriya pokes Todoroki again, and he doesn't even do it in a ticklish spot, or hard enough to warrant any type of reaction, but his boyfriend feigns collapsing, and now his entire weight is on top of him.

"Oi," he whines, "get off me! You're heavy."

Todoroki mumbles something Midoriya can't decipher, then rubs the sides of their faces together.

"Nope; I like it here. I think I might just stay forever."

"You're ridiculous," Midoriya huffs. He gives up trying to push Todoroki off, and instead places an arm around him.

"Yeah, but you like it."

Midoriya angles his head so he can look down at Todoroki. "I really, really do." And when Todoroki looks up, when their eyes meet, his heart swells. He has so many feelings for this boy, and he knows this is just the beginning, that there is so much more awaiting them.

Todoroki simply smiles, and returns to his previous position. "You're not so bad yourself."

They spend the rest of the afternoon lying there, ignoring their homework, as well as the barrage of texts coming in from their classmates. Sometime later, Todoroki will confess something he's been thinking about for a while. He will tell Midoriya about how he hated the heat of his fire, and how he's always preferred coldness—of his ice, of soba, of the weather.

But, he will say, he gets the appeal of it now; he understands how welcoming warmth is, because he feels it wrapped in Midoriya's arms. The temperature of his blue flames is high, but the way Midoriya makes him feel burns hotter.

Midoriya, of course, will become flustered. He will flail, cursing at Todoroki, asking how he's so goddamned poetic. And Todoroki will simply shrug, because he honestly doesn't know either. He does know that Midoriya's presence instantly makes him feel better though, under any circumstance, and he's lucky to have him as a boyfriend. Midoriya, lost for words, will only be able to respond with kisses.

All of that will happen in due time, but right now? They're exactly where they need to be, where they belong—with each other.


End file.
